Hide-and-Seek - страница 23

“But Mother—”

“We made that decision together and you’ll find it in his last will. The reading will take place tomorrow morning. I trust you’ll be here to hear it.”

I didn’t have to literally bury my father amongst my entrepreneurial projects. Fewer complications, but it didn’t make me any happier. I tried to remember my time with him as a kid, which wasn’t that much. I was used to seeing him entertaining his guests more than his own children and going away on his business trips way more frequently than travelling with us. Nevertheless, there were a few rare moments – a couple fishing of trips and assembling a boat model together–which could’ve almost overshadowed the loneliness of a boy who spent more time with his nanny than with his parents. Almost, but not quite. I had never compared my parents to anyone. When it came to my parents, I dealt with what I had been given without even thinking that it could be any other way. Despite the status and social calendars, living in a big house could be quite solitary for a boy. It was before Charlie was born. When he came along, he instantly became the center of attention, and I realized that solitude had various levels. That initiated quite a lengthy period during which my tiny and fragile connection with my parents became stretched to its limit. I was lucky, though, that Charlier had adored his elder brother despite all my flaws, and I cherished that in my own way.

It was time to say goodbye to my father. I had done that many times when he was alive. This time was supposed to be different, and I was trying to feel the loss in my callused heart. I loved my father, and I was sure he loved me too. Unfortunately, we hadn’t had a strong enough connection to convey that feeling to each other.

“I’ll be there, Mother,” I said and rang off.

I suspected that I would be away for a considerable amount of time and decided to make one more phone call before I started packing. I felt that I needed to let Natasha know about what had happened. It was a curious feeling because I had never needed to report my movements to anyone. Was I developing some feelings for her, serious enough to make a phone call like that? Or was I simply trying to make sure she would feel too sorry for me to gallivant with other men while I was gone?

“I’m so sorry, Sasha.” She sounded genuine on the phone. “Would you like me to go with you?”

“Thank you, Natasha. I think I just need to spend some time with my mother, you know?” I did not feel that it was the real reason why I wanted to go alone, but that was all I could think of at that moment. “Why don’t I call you from France and will let you know how it goes? Will that be all right?”

“Sure. Whatever you need, Sasha,” she said and sighed. “I wish I could’ve met him.”

“He would’ve liked you, Natasha,” I said and suddenly realized that it could have been a real possibility even though Natasha was not of a noble rank. My father would have recognized the hardworking essence of her personality if he’d had a chance to meet her.

“I’ll let you go. Sorry. You’ll probably be insanely busy with all the funeral stuff and the inheritance.”

Oh, there it was. Natasha was sorry, but never missed an opportunity to get useful information.

“Yes. I suppose I will.”