Unlimited - страница 24

‘I have to come back. I must finish what I have started before she wakes up. I would like to give you a piece of advice for the future. Never try to slap a demon in the face again. I don’t like it. Most of all that I don’t like you doing this because you just couldn’t resist having pleasure, could you? Puzzle your desires out, Victoria.’

Kharon gave her an unpleasant smile and disappeared, having left the girl to think of her behaviour and desires.

‘Vic!’ the mother called behind the door, ‘You’re sleeping there, aren’t you?’

‘No!’ the girl answered immediately, turned off the tap.

‘Sure?’

‘Yes, yes, I am! I’m coming. Give me two minutes!’

‘Don’t hurry. I just wanted to know if you’re ok.’

“Puzzled out your desires, Victoria…” The last sentence that Kharon said was circling around her head unrestrained. Vic had puzzled her desires out long ago, but she couldn’t puzzle her consciousness, society values, surrounding persons’ meanings out.

For her the most terrible phobia was how society would see her. Certainly, you would hardly surprise with casual sex five minutes after having made acquaintance. Nobody said that it was ok, but nobody stopped it. And Victoria, certainly, wasn’t afraid of that, neither dishonourable nor that casual stupid sex.

Victoria found more terrible thing than society – it was God.

After the last demon’s visit when Vic was in bed, quiet music was playing on the background, muffling the darkness, the girl suddenly realized that if there were demons and deuces then there was God and angels. On the one hand that absolute crazy equality almost drove her mad at all. The demon was too attractive. She didn’t have enough strength to fight her own feelings. To her horror she got that she didn’t want just to have sex with a man of extra-terrestrial beauty, but she wanted him to love her. She wanted to love.

God appearance in her atheistic thoughts wasn’t planned. Would he forgive her for the lascivious thoughts? For one of deadly sins of humanity? Would he let her look at the fabulous paradise gate with half an eye? Would he vouchsafe her his look even contemptible one? Victoria was going to make a fatal mistake and there would be no one to blame but her, the mistake which she was going to be responsible for before Lord in the highest, disgracefully dropping her eyes.

It was so strange and crazy simultaneously feeling to realize the price of her own actions and all the same, contrary to all rules, she kept on planning to perform deeds qualitative. She had a feeling of inevitability and doom. That was all, she had no strength to correct something, to prepare for murderous feast, where she was going to devour the only one dish – retribution. It was going to be forever.

Victoria’s consciousness was full of desperation. She was scared, her heart was paralyzed with terror while her imagination was drawing pictures of justice, but her soul… Was it honest if contrary to all rules, it rushed to her one-side love that she had made up?

‘Hi, Vasilisa.’ Vic dialled her friend. ‘Aren’t sleeping? What’re you doing?’

‘No, I am not. I’m gonna hang out with my friends from university. You?’

‘Me…I’m at home. Stupid me, I thought that you’re at home and we’d speak… I’ve broken up with Daniel…’

‘Oh, shit!’ Vasilisa took a sad sigh. ‘You couldn’t imagine how I hated myself for blabbing out. First, I thought that it wasn’t my business, then I thought you had to know. If I’d calumniated, I’d have apologized, haven’t I, Vic? You aren’t mad at me, are you? Did he confess?’